Eames was bored
by RoseEmily
Summary: Boredom drives Eames to do things that have... interesting results. The original story idea came from another fic, so kudos for the writer and sorry I couldn't find you again.


Eames was bored. He had already gone through the case files three times at least, he had perfected his forge to a level that even the woman's own mother wouldn't know the difference between him and her daughter and he wasn't in the mood for gambling. It wasn't that odd really, he wasn't such a gambler as everyone seemed to think; he gambled only when he felt like it and knew he had a chance to win. No one said anything about not cheating; he just had a chance to win. So there he sat, on one of the chairs they used for practice runs, leaning back and fiddling around with his totem.  
The only other person in the room was Arthur, his form hunched over his computer, feverish tapping of the keyboard filling the room. Ever since the inception job the man had become even more obsessed about getting every single detail correct; something to do with the fact that he'd missed the information about Fishers mind being militarized and all. Eames really didn't see the point to fuzz; they had all gotten out alive after all, even if it had been a close call for Dom and Saito. But apparently Arthur had been somewhat traumatized by the fact that he had made a mistake. Now that Eames started to think about it, the man had been sitting in front of that little screen of his for the entire day, non-stop. Eames couldn't even remember him having bathroom breaks. He could probably use the break and entertainment just as much as he did, if not more. Thus, he decided that it was time to yank that gorgeous little point man back to reality, out of the cyber space that had seemingly swallowed him whole.  
"Darling."  
No answer was given. Not even a single flinch. Usually Arthurs back tensed up from the smallest of whisper; if it had something to do with Eames calling him by a pet name that is. Apparently the point man was deeper in the depths than what he had thought. Eames huffed slightly, a bit amused. This might actually be more entertaining than he had originally thought. And it had already been entertaining in his mind.  
"Darling?"  
The slightly louder call got the reaction he was looking for; the small tension of the point man's back, indicating that he was now aware of his company but had chosen to ignore him. Probably because of the pet name, that was something so like Arthur.  
Eames couldn't help but chuckle. He was going to get his entertainment, one way or the other.  
"Arthur?"  
The point man swung on his chair, eyes glowing with fury and stared back at him. He looked like he was about to explode.  
"What _is_ it? Some of us are actually trying to work here Eames." was all he got as a reply, before the other just turned back to the screen and kept on tapping the keyboard like it was something he could kill.  
"As you can see," Eames said waiving his hands and gesturing at the empty storage room they had as a base, "we're the only ones here. Besides, I'm bored."  
"Your point Mr. Eames, I would highly appreciate if you got to it."  
"Do something about it."  
Eames could not see it, but he was sure Arthur was rolling his eyes to the screen, mentally cursing himself for taking this job with the forger.  
"Why me?" it was just a mere sigh, a rhetorical question that really didn't need an answer, but Eames was dedicated to give one anyway, as his mischievous mind had already come up with the perfect answer;  
"Well I don't know, because you're the only one here, or because of the fact that you're gay, you choose."  
The abrupt stop of the tapping told Eames he had caught the other man off guard. The tension on his back was something that didn't imply anything pretty and the look he gave the forger was promising a horrible and slow death.  
"WHAT? What the _hell_ makes you say something like that?"  
Eames leant back and basked at the full attention of Arthur, knowing, that the computer and whatever he had been doing on it we're now completely forgotten; the full attention of the point man had now been moved to the forger, and he rather liked the situation.  
"Just stating facts love." he said, stretching every word and pronouncing them as clearly as possible for Arthur to hear. Apparently he knew all the right buttons to push, as the point man suddenly twirled on the chair, facing the computer screen again;  
"I'm not even talking to you, this is ridiculous."  
The speed of the tapping had slowed down though, and Eames took it as an invitation to continue. With a crooked smile on his lips he kept on taunting;  
"Oh, I think you are love. You're just so deep in denial that you can't seem to admit it even to yourself."  
This time Arthur seemed to be keeping on to his original plan of ignoring him, just silently muttering to himself something on the lines of Eames being completely mad and this all being such a bad idea and why in the love of all things good and pure had Dom insisted on getting that bloody English smartass on the bloody team.  
"Come on darling, don't be this way. Don't treat me like I'm some sort of nut job."  
Arthur gave him a quick, evil glare over his shoulder, and slammed the laptop shut, standing up from the chair and starting to pack his things.  
"Not talking to you, ever again."  
Eames just chuckled.  
"You just did."  
Arthur kept on packing his things, neatly putting away a cord after another, piling the papers in neat piles and getting ready to leave without even looking at Eames. This wasn't acceptable; Eames wasn't nearly ready, he was still bored.  
"Come one love, stop pouting."  
No answer, just swiftly moving hands collecting all the cords of the passive into the silver case.  
"I'm still bored."  
Eames should have known that that wouldn't bring forth the desirable reaction; the point man hadn't reacted to it moments before, why would he react now. There was only one way he could think of to get a reaction from the other man before he left and it was too late, it was a bit of a gamble though; he could end up with a black eye and a broken arm (Arthur wouldn't kill him as that would endanger the job they were doing, but he wouldn't be needing that arm. Not too crucially at least.), but, as said before he did like to gamble when he saw chances of winning, and there was definitely something in the way that Arthur glared that told him he could win.  
"Fine, if you want to be this way…" and he went for it.  
"WHAT THE HELL? Stop _touching me_!"  
There was a furious right hook aiming for his eye just as he had expected, and somehow he managed to avoid it, and at the same time maintain a wolfish grin on his face.  
"No need to hit me love."  
"Then keep your filthy hands to yourself!" the glare that Arthur gave him was shooting daggers, and somewhere behind all that rage Eames could, for even his own surprise, see a small blush rising on to the cheeks of the point man. Could it really be that he had betted for the right horse? He smiled and lifted up his hands as if in surrender, but in his mind he was having a victory feast.  
"I shall never touch you again, if you don't want me to."  
Arthur scoffed and rolled his eyes as if questioning why he would ever want Eames' hands on him. Then he aimed his stare at Eames' eyes and asked, what was probably the most obvious question in this situation;  
"What in the nine hells made you pinch my ass?"  
Eames just kept on grinning and answered:  
"Boredom."  
This time it was Arthurs turn to throw his arms in the air in mock defeat.  
"You can't just use that as an excuse for everything Eames."  
"I just did."  
"Oh for Christ's sake Eames, grow up."  
Arthur turned and went back too packing his things.  
"I don't want to. Quite frankly I think that you too should let your inner child out sometimes as well." Eames was being serious, of course, Arthur letting loose would be a sight for sore eyes, that much was certain, but apparently Arthur seemed to think that he was playing some sort of a joke on him as he just sneered and kept on putting his things away.  
"Go bother someone else then," the point man said, "isn't there a bar or a casino nearby where you could spend the last of your money?"  
"But you're the most fun love, besides I don't feel like gambling and I sure don't feel like drinking, unless you're up for a couple. Then I could perhaps come join you and have a nice talk." This was the truth, again; Eames would have enjoyed a nice drink or two with the rather attractive point man. This he had told him many times.  
"You're being ridiculous again. Why would I be the more fun? You've said millions of times that I'm just a stick in the mud who has absolutely no imagination." Arthur had now turned to Eames and had his arms crossed protectively on his chest. Could Eames be reading him right? Could this actually be Arthur a bit… offended?  
"Love, I never mean it; it's just that you're so easy to annoy," now Arthur looked just annoyed; exactly where Eames had been heading. He would never tell that the other members of the group where even easier to annoy and that's why they became so boring so quickly; an easy puzzle never had been fun for Eames. But he wasn't going to let Arthur know that, now was he?  
"So that's why you're always picking a fight with me?"  
" Well, we're not in the kindergarten anymore darling, I'm not actually "picking a fight". But yes, that is the reason why I tease you; that, and the fact that you look rather appealing while agitated." Eames said this as casually as he could, not avoiding eye contact or giving away his slight embarrassment in any other way either, making the point man even more confused and baffled.  
"I'm… what?" the look on Arthurs face definitely made up for the almost hit to the face for Eames. His lips were slightly parted to form a questioning o and his eyebrows had shifted from their normal scrunch upwards, so that they gave him a completely surprised look. Eames just smiled,  
"No need to look so scandalized love."  
Then Arthurs face stiffened again and the look returned to the normal squint as if he were trying to judge Eames. Which he obviously was as he the next thing he did was to accuse Eames of joking;  
"Ha-ha. Very funny. You're trying to make fun of me aren't you? Well, I assure you it won't work."  
And with this he turned and gathered the last things from the table and turned to leave the storage. His walk telling something he didn't; he had been hurt by the things Eames had said, and that had never been the forgers goal; quite on the contrary. That was why Eames ran after the other man and grabbed him by his hand, even if it was just to get it tugged away again. At least the point man had stopped.  
"Really love, I'm being quite serious here. You do look very attractive when you're agitated; your face lights up and your eyes glisten. It's the only emotion you let through, and really, if it is the only one I'm allowed to see then fine. I can live with that."  
As Eames ranted on (he knew he was ranting, he did that a lot around the point man), his eyes wondered to the ceiling and a small smile rose to his lips.  
As there was no sound from Arthur, he stopped and turned his gaze back to the point man. He was now again looking at him, with even more wonder than before; just standing there, halfway to the front door of the storage, just staring at Eames. And Eames stared back.  
"You're… you're being serious, aren't you?  
Eames chuckled.  
"Of course."  
Arthur made a small noise in the back of his throat; something in the middle of scoff and a chuckle. Then he met Eames' eyes again and the look on his face was victorious.  
"And you think I'm gay." now the point man was full on chuckling. It ended fast though when Eames let out a simple yes. Then he just snorted and rolled his eyes;  
"What are you then?"  
"A silly question if you ask me," Eames said, "open for love of course."  
Now Arthur was just huffing in disbelief and rolling his eyes. He was obviously not buying Eames' explanation, even though the man was completely serious about it.  
"You need a doctor Mr. Eames. I know a good one, I can even give you his business card; he'll fix you right up. If it is even possible anymore, you've obviously hit your head pretty hard, there might be some unfixable brain damage, or perhaps a tumor…"  
Eames chuckled; this was the Arthur he was hoping to bring out; the sarcastic fun Arthur who knew all the good puns.  
"I'm just fine love, I should be offering my condolences to you, as you've restricted your sex life to only one gender, and clearly to the wrong one as well."  
"I'm not _gay_, Eames." Arthur said as he turned around and started walking to the door again, only this time adjusting his steps to Eames'.  
"Oh but I think you are love." Eames said as he opened the door for the point man.  
"And what makes you think so?" Arthur asked, now more friendly, which Eames just counted on the fact that they were in the outside world, and screaming and death threats might cause too much unwanted attention.  
"Your cute little house wife attitude." Eames said. This made Arthur glare at Eames like saying that he should be happy they were surrounded with people, other vice he would have missed that arm. Instead of hitting him, Arthur just composed himself so quickly that all Eames could do was admire him. The question that was spoken through gritted teeth betrayed him though;  
"What was that supposed to mean?"  
Eames just smiled and stretched his arms, feeling very content on his achievements;  
"It's just the way you mother hen everyone on the team, make sure they get enough food, do the laundry and take care of them if they get hurt… you'd be the perfect wife."  
This made Arthur stop on his tracks and glare at Eames, not even caring that an old woman collided on him because he'd stopped so abruptly.  
"_Eames._" came the low growl. Arthur was making chills run down the forger's spine without any intention; not at least that kind of thrills we're at his sight.  
For the second time of the day Eames threw his hands up in the air in defeat.  
"You can stop with the growling love, it's not my fault you act this way."  
"I do _not _act like a housewife."  
Arthur was still glaring, but continued to walk. Eames followed a few steps behind him.  
"Alright, perhaps not yet, but you could. With the right person you would act just like a house wife."  
He got another murderous glare and a scoff for that one. But Arthur kept on walking.  
"And you think you're the right person for that job?"  
This was said more casually than what Eames had expected. The point man was walking with his hands in his pockets; like a man who has no worries in the entire world. And yes, he thought that he was, had thought so for a while now. This was getting really interesting now. Eames was definitely not bored anymore.  
"Yes, yes I do… wait a second darling, who are you calling?" Eames had caught the point man going for his phone, quietly pressing the small buttons.  
"Cobb. Someone has obviously brainwashed you or gotten the hold of my totem and this is just a dream."  
So that was why he had been walking with his hands in his pockets. Eames sighed and grabbed the phone from the other man and pushed the red button.  
"Love. This is not a dream. Nor am I brainwashed. I told you I'm perfectly fine. And serious."  
Arthur made a bee line for the phone, but didn't quite reach it, and Eames just kept staring at him, into his eyes, right there in the middle of the street in the late evening of Paris.  
Arthur was the one to break the eye contact with a huff.  
"You're a conman and a forger Eames. It's highly unlikely that you're being serious."  
Eames sighed and looked at the sky that had already started to glow red with the falling sun, and the first stars of the night could be seen blinking on the sky. Still looking at the stars he said;  
"I'm just tired of the game love… so sick and tired of it."  
He gave Arthur a sad little smile, something the point man had never seen. The forger always seemed to be so happy and living life to the fullest; he was never sad, he was never supposed to be sad.  
"What game?"  
Eames looked at the point man, and he would have wanted to say that there was a small blink of interest in his eyes. Just a small one.  
"This," Eames said and waved his hand between himself and the point man. "all this tension between us. You could cut it with a knife sometimes. And the most frustrating thing is that you're not making clear what kind of tension it is."  
"Mmhmm. And what kind of tension do you think it is then?"  
"Sexual."  
"Eames. There is most definitely no sexual tension between us."  
Eames chuckled and shook his head. Poor Arthur was so clueless sometimes.  
"Yes there is love. There's me always trying to flirt with you and you ignoring me; then you start pseudo-flirting with the closest woman just to convince yourself that you're not gay; if that's not sexual tension, I don't know what is. Everyone sees that you're just faking it, so you can stop."  
Now Eames was lying. No one had the slightest inkling that Arthur might actually swing the other way; he even knew that Ariadne had a slight puppy-crush on the man, but he wasn't telling him that. He was like a man on a mission.  
"I'm not pretending."  
The statement was vague, and the point man was now avoiding eye contact; one of the most basic tells of someone who was lying, which Eames was sure Arthur knew, which in itself made harder to decide if the point man was actually telling the truth or not. He shrugged a bit to himself and decided to probe more.  
"So tell me love; when was the last time you slept with one of the women you flirted with?"  
The small tensing of Arthurs back told Eames everything he needed to know, but he listened to the point man any way;

"I'm not one to kiss and tell, Mr. Eames."  
There was now a wide grin on Eames' face. He had the point man right where he wanted now.  
"No, but this would be the perfect time to brag about it a bit; just to save your heterosexual dignity and all."  
Arthur was walking again now; he'd probably be pacing if the road wasn't long enough.  
"Well, in Brussels last month there was this…"  
"Love. You need to remember that I'm the forger here. I know when you're lying. I've been studying you for years now."  
Eames was bluffing. Mostly. He did know Arthurs demeanor inside and out, true, but the point man was such a good liar that he could have almost fooled the lie detector. But apparently Arthur didn't know this, as he stopped again with a slight blush on his face and didn't say anything after that.  
"See?" Eames said casually, but on the inside he was singing. This had worked out better than what he had originally thought when he was sitting in the storage room; he had thought he'd get a bickering started at the most, but the way this was going…  
"Just because I don't bed every girl I come across doesn't mean I'm gay."  
…and then again it was Arthur he was talking about. He smiled and shook his head, for what seemed like the thousandth time that evening. He'd just have to go another way then, it wasn't like he didn't have a backup plan.  
"Well," he stretched the word as he said it, making Arthur raise his eye brow questioningly, "no. It doesn't."  
Arthur gave him a squint.  
"What does it prove it then?"  
Eames smiled smugly at Arthur and you could almost see how his brains enjoyed the moment of anticipation in the other man's eyes.  
"It just means that you have your eye on someone else."  
They walked a while in silence before the words seemed to sink in to Arthur's brain. Then the point man started a hearty laugh that filled the now almost empty streets. Any one that heard it would have thought it to be someone really enjoying themselves. Eames on the other hand wasn't anyone; he could hear the faint nervousness behind the laughter.  
"And you think that someone is you."  
"Yes I do." Eames said and leaned in close so that he could whisper the next words into the point man's ear, "you're _so_ into me." The small hairs in Arthurs neck rose as an answer to the breath on it, and the blush came back, brighter than before.  
"I'm not. I would rather die in the hands of Cobolt than have sex with you."  
Eames backed away with the smile still on his face;  
"No need to be shy love. " Eames said and leaned closer again.  
"_Eames_!"  
It was Eames' turn to give a hearty laugh.  
"You're such a prude love. But don't worry, it's not just sex; I want to do the whole thing."  
Arthur stared at him skeptically.  
"What, you want to try anal intercourse?"  
Eames lifted his hands to his heart in a mock offence and arousal. It did arouse him a bit though.  
"Bugger. You should warn a man before saying something like that love. And where have you been hiding that dirty mind of yours?"  
Arthur rolled his eyes but couldn't resist the urge to laugh as well.  
"I must have developed it during the time I've spent with you."  
"Oh no, I can't take all the credit." Eames said with a wolf grin plastered to his face, as Arthur seemed to stay completely oblivious to the thing he had just said.  
"But what I did actually mean with what I said was a relationship." Eames said and grabbed the point man's arm and looked into his eyes, "and I would really want to try it with you. Your suggestion does sound really promising as well though." He couldn't help the joke, it just slipped there. As much as he knew about people, he was still just a human, and quite frankly this situation was intimidating him a bit.  
Arthur didn't care, he just chuckled a bit more; and for that Eames thanked the gods.  
"You've gone completely insane haven't you?"  
"No, I'm just tired of the game; I want to have some conclusion. I already told you this love."  
"And you were bored."  
Eames had to laugh at that. Arthur, the stick in the mud Arthur had just made a joke.  
"Yes, and bored. And you," Eames poked Arthur just to make a point, "work too much darling. You need to relax at some point, and I can help you with that." He wiggled his eyebrows and gave the point man a wide grin. To his surprise it was answered with a smile.  
"Eames, I don't think you could ever pursue an actual relationship. What about all the ladies that are most certainly going spike your interest?"  
At this Eames squinted a bit and then relaxed his face. He doubted there was ever going to be anyone who could make him feel the same way as the point man did.  
"I can't promise you anything," he said this because he knew it was true, and that the point man would understand, "but I would like to try and be monogamous for you. If you'll always look like you do now, I don't think that'll be a problem."  
For his surprise Arthur laughed.  
"Did I just hear the word 'monogamous' come out of your mouth?"  
Eames smiled and rolled his eyes.  
"Look, we both know that none of us is stupid, so don't act as if I am."  
"I know you're not stupid Eames. And that's part of the problem." Arthur was now looking straight at Eames, keeping the eye contact, searching, "You're a conman Eames. You know how to charm your way into people's pants."  
Eames sighed. It was a lost call then. Well, you can't win every time, perhaps next time then.  
"That's a final no then?"  
"No, actually it's a yes."  
This caught the forger off guard. This was not something he had been expecting to happen.  
"Really?" was all he could get out of his mouth.  
Arthur chuckled and looked at his hands.  
"No need to look so surprised. I'm not stupid either Eames. And not taking the chance in bedding you would be just that."  
Eames was full on smiling now; the biggest smile he had been wearing since god knows when.  
"So. Does this mean you find me sexy?" he was wiggling his eye brows again, which made Arthur laugh. They were walking down in star light now, almost at the hotel where they were staying.  
"I can't deny your appearance hold some interest to me." Arthur said, and the feeling the answer sent through Eames was mind boggling.  
"So you do believe me?" Eames felt like a small child on Christmas.  
"Not the relationship part of course, but definitely the sex part."  
This made Eames' mood drop a bit, but he would make the point man believe. He had time.  
"But what if I'm lying about the sex part? What if there's someone taking pictures of us while we…"  
"Then you'd have to explain your own position in the pictures. Besides, if we get started and you try to weasel your way out of it, I'll know for sure you've been lying."  
Eames was impressed. He had forgotten how logical and witty the point man was. But he still had a couple of aces up his sleeve.  
"Wouldn't it still prove that you're gay?"  
Arthur gave him the slyest smile he'd ever seen the point man wear.  
"No. It would only prove that I could stand it longer than you and that I'm the better conman of us both."  
Eames was completely surprised. And he did love surprises.  
"Is that a… challenge? Do I actually hear a _challenge_?"  
Arthur chuckled as they stopped at the front door of their hotel.  
"If that's what you want to call it."  
Eames smiled widely.  
"Then what are we waiting for darling, your place or mine?"

-_fin_-


End file.
